|Will the real Lolita please stand up?|
To this day I tend to respond "We've decided to dress up." when others asking what or why are you wearing such clothes. People respond better to this and there's no need to include "Lolita" in your response. However if people are persistence, then if you must use the term "Lolita fashion." Only when you have no other options.
People within this fashion community have attempted to relabel Lolita but to no avail. As such instead of relabeling the fashion, relabel yourself.
If you are taking the plunge or having second thoughts whether you should try Lolita fashion - remember it is just a name. Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me. While it's true that words do hurt you, it hurts only a little bit at first. And if you have the right petticoat and the right amount of friends, they will just bounce off.
You are not a Lolita, you are you. It just so happens you like to wear clothes with a petticoat and blouses with puffed sleeves. The label Lolita is attached to style of dress, not you. Giving a name power by calling it taboo is absurd, because at the end of the day you are wearing a blouse/skirt/one-piece/jumperskirt from Angelic Pretty/ Baby the Stars Shine Bright/ Innocent World/ Metamorphose/etc. These happen to be designer brands associated with Lolita fashion.
While it does feel like a magical girl transformation from regular you to Lolita you -- you are still the same underneath. Nothing changes. "Lolita" is just a name.
So pronounce it with me (it's on the tip of your tongue).
Lo. Lee. Ta.